Monday, October 22, 2007
The main thing I wanted to say was that I have actually felt a little better about the whole thing with my mom. I talked to my friend today and I said that my mom still hasn't called me. She said that she thinks it will come in time. Who knows? One thing I do know, my family is complicated! Always has been and, I am pretty sure, always will be! But I don't know if I would change it if I could. Its the way things have always been. Its oddly comfortable, familiar.
I will stop rambling....and keep trying to make things work with my crazy and trying family!!
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
He asked me to set the timer and so that's how we got the 2 good ones of him. The others were just him being crazy.
The crazy cousins. Elizabeth, Olivia and Joshua. They are are too funny!! I had a great time visiting with them. After I said goodbye to them and Grandma, I went and saw some friends there at the school and my Andrew. He and Sarah were in class but I thought I would catch Andrew at recess or lunch. I wasn't even going to try and see Sarah. She would have gone ballistic. Whenever she sees me she wants to stay with me. So I wanted to save Mrs Brenda from having to deal with a crazy Sarah. But I did catch up with Andrew in his class and got to visit with him and his classmates and teachers. I was glad to see that he seemed to be doing really well. He is soo dear to my heart and it just thrills me to see him thriving in class. With all his problems I am glad to see that it hasn't slowed him down at all. In fact he seems to do better. After I had visited with him, I headed out to the car but I saw Joshua's teacher from a year or two ago and so I had to say hi. While I was visiting with them Andrew came running out on to the playground, screaming my name. Makes me soo happy to have a little child yell for me because they are excited to see me. So I grabbed him up and snapped this picture.
Sorry for the visible green gum. I forget that it shows up soo well. But isn't he just the cutest thing ever?! I love him sooo much!! After spending the day with 2/3 of my kids made me really really miss them. Don't get me wrong, I glad to be at Lifefway. But I miss the kids. and seeing them grow up. Finding out that Sarah peepeed in the potty for the first time yesterday and I wasn't there, really made me sad. How crazy is that?! Today was the kind of day that we would have spent hanging out at Granny White Park. Me setting in the swing. Kids running around. But at least I still can go see them. They are close enough to go and spend time with them.
Okay well, I did have a lot more that I wanted to say but I will save that for later. I have been setting out on the floor of the deck for quite some time and quite frankly, my bum is about die!!So cheerio for now! Ta!
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
Monday, August 27, 2007
One of the reasons I dropped out of choir and ultimately, church, was I was just feeling soo alone. In a church that has more people there on a Sunday morning than my hometown, it's hard to believe that you could feel lonely, but I did. When I started going there, I was involved in a women's bible study at another church with some friends of mine. They were my small group, my accountability group. But because of church issues and childcare issues, they had to move the day of the study and it was moved to a day that I couldn't attend. I had been in the same group of ladies for over 2 yrs. I was closer to God than I had ever been in my whole life. While I understood why it had to be changed, I was very upset. It really shook me. I wasn't that happy at my job, I was going to church by myself and now my bible study, my core group, was being taken away from me. It really sent me into a state of depression. I mean, for over 2yrs, every Thursday, I would meet my friends, we would study God's word and then spend time fellowshiping at lunch, and now it was gone. That was the hardest things I have ever had to go through. I am not sure I have even fully recovered. Because after that I started just going to choir and then leaving. Not staying for service. Then it was I would only go if the song was one of my favorites. Then it was just to go for the special choir concert. Then I started to feel guilty because I was going to church for completely the wrong reason. So would just sleep. I slept a lot through that time. I got involved in some thing I never would have dreamed I would be involved in. Although I am no longer a part of it, it still has taken some time to get over. While I was doing nothing illegal, it was still something I had been raised no to do and yet I was. So while I was down in the pit, I made a job change. One of the best decisions I have ever made. While I miss my kids, I know that I am better off at the bookstore. I love being back there. I love helping the customers. I love getting to know them, as they come in regularly. I love starting my day out with prayer and devotion with my fellow associates. I love having deep, theological discussions with them. I love it. God knew that I needed to be back there and I am soo glad that I actually listened and followed Him. While I am no where near where I was before, I am pulling out of what ever it was I was in. I am excited about going back to church! I am excited about singing in the choir! I am looking forward to meeting new people in the choir. I am hoping to get involved in Sunday school again. I am just glad to be feeling happy about it again.
God is so great! He just amazes me constantly! Oh if only I would pay more attention!!
Thursday, August 23, 2007
I am soo jazzed to have this thingy!! I have wanted one for the longest time and now its here!! Yay!! I am still having to get used to the keypad on here. Quite different than what I am used to. But I am sure that I will adapt. When Stef moves out, sad day, I won't have to start going to the Library again to check my email. Thats what I did when I lived out in the boondocks. Although sometimes I miss being out there. It was sooo quiet and spacious. And it was just me and Stef. But those were the days of the past. Time to move on.
I am having to force my self off of the computer every night. Now that I can read in bed, I never want to leave it. I keep finding new and even more interesting things to do and see. I am sure that one day it will pass. Who knows though?
I'm going to run. I am starving and have food waiting for me. Yummy rice!!
PS if anyone has a good idea for a name please let me know. You may be the winner! Of an imaginary contest of course! ;)
Friday, July 13, 2007
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Monday, July 9, 2007
I'm not where I was before but I am no longer headed in the wrong direction and I thank God for his faithfulness!!